GOODBYE
For the longest time, this is what I've wanted to do.. To leave. Get out. Say goodbye. In my mind, that is the best thing to do. The right thing to do. But my heart is more stubborn than I thought. And I hate the way my heart is in so much pain right now because it refuses to understand and let go.
So I really am not ready yet. To say goodbye. But I will. I have to. Because I want my life back. I want to start over. Forget all the bad things. Move on. And I want to believe again that somewhere out there, there is someone who will love me completely, and will have so much passion for me now, as he will have 20 years from now. And I will love him completely, and I will have so much passion for him now, and will have the same passion 20 years from now. I want to feel the magic. The natural high of being with someone you can't do without. Someone who is as necessary as air and water. Someone who will treat me right. Someone I will love as greatly. Someone who will not ask me to love him more than I love myself, because he has enough love for himself. Someone who will be my partner. My lover. My friend. And we will love each other without end.
And maybe I'm naive to think such love exists. Because so far in this lifetime, I have failed to find such love. Somehow, the magic always fades.. The passion always dies... But, I will not give up on that belief that it does exist. Not just yet.. Somehow, I will find that kind of love that lasts forever...
I've said so many goodbyes than I care to count.. And now, I will say another one... To the man I thought was that ONE person I will spend the rest of my life with.. And maybe you're right.. Maybe one day, we will find each other again.. And maybe that love we are looking for was staring back at us all along... But in order for us to find that out, we have to say goodbye... I have to say goodbye. So that I can set your heart free.. and mine, too...
Goodbye, MB.
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