Life can be ecstatic, exciting and extraordinary... if you make it to be.

« Home

LOVE IS THE CLOSEST THING TO MAGIC »ONE DAY AT A TIME »INEVITABLE SIGH »LOVELY THINGS »ANOTHER RED MARK FROM KIYOSAKI »MESSING WITH MY AURA »CHRISTMAS WISH LIST ITEM #14 »I'M BROKE BUT I'M HAPPY »BUMMER »SOMEBODY CURE ME! » 

REWIND

Published Friday, September 15, 2006 by XY | E-mail this post

E-mail this post



Remember me (?)



All personal information that you provide here will be governed by the Privacy Policy of Blogger.com. More...


I just woke up after taking a nap early tonight. Couldn't get back to sleep. Someone must be thinking of me right now. Harhar.

Still not in the mood for Fish, I found myself browsing thru my '02 archives. Finally know the answer to one of our caught-in-traffic-with-friends questions: "What was the sweetest thing you've ever done for your loved one?" I could not think of anything special then. But then I read about how I threw a surprise birthday party for an ex circa 2001 back In Oregon. Wow. I do "sweet" after all. Hehehe.

I sounded so young then.

"Time really flies fast... It's all becoming so real now... Three more months, and I'll be packing my bags again. I didn't feel this way a couple of years ago. Sad. Apprehensive. Back then, it was just part of my routine. I've never stayed long enough anywhere to get attached. But it's different now. It's been exactly a year since I arrived in Manila from my last assignment. This is the longest I've been in one place since I started living a nomadic life 5 years ago. But it's not just the length of time. Now I have a home - this tiny condo unit filled with orange and green furniture and purple knick-knacks. My room was a witness to those sleepless nights I spent crying my heart out, my Piglet pillow dutifully absorbing all the tears. This is where I’ve discovered the real meaning of independence. This couch I'm sitting on is my official work space. The previous times, I really wasn't leaving my family, because they already live oceans away, anyway. But now I've formed and renewed friendships with people I've spent a lot of time with, and who were with me when I felt the loneliest. They made me laugh… reflect on life... They are friends who’ve helped me as I healed from all the pain in the past. They are friends who are dear to me. Friends I love.

I may just be getting tired of living out of my suitcase. I may be a little scared of the new challenges coming my way. I may just be getting old. Whatever it is, for the first time, I dislike the idea of leaving. Because even when I was in Manila and not in some place outside our country, I've never really felt like I was home. So it never felt like I was actually leaving… I was just going somewhere… on and on.. It didn't matter to where. I was just drifting from one place to another. But now, I’ve actually stopped drifting long enough to be home once again, after a long time..."

So much has happened since then. In spite of finally getting my own condo unit, it's the first time in years I'm thinking of moving again. But this time around, I'm planning to go where my heart is taking me... and hope this time around, it will be for good :)





Dose Me

Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com