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Published Wednesday, May 01, 2002 by XY | E-mail this post

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GIRLS IN THE CITY
“I’d like to believe that I’m not looking for someone, but the fact that I go on dates tells me otherwise. But why is it that I always find something wrong with these men? Am I crazy?” Arlene’s expression was almost worn-out.

Petite and I unanimously answered NO! Yes, I admit, even as I’m happy as a single twenty-something girl who is not dating anyone special at the moment, it does get lonely at times. But that should never let us become complacent if there’s a room for doubt in our minds and in our hearts. Don’t settle. In the end, it’s just going to become lonelier. All the ranting and raving about bad relationships becomes old and hackneyed, as well.

It was almost cinematic that my two best friends and I were hanging out in the “Sex and the City” bar tour party in Venezia while having this conversation. Here we were, three friends who were smart and successful (ahem :)), but found ourselves struggling when it comes to the dynamics of male-female relationships. Arlene tells us about her dating life. She is (was?) dating an engineer. They had a few good dates. She likes the guy. But then all of a sudden the guys stops calling. She doesn’t have a clue what happened. She met a lawyer. Had several stimulating text and phone conversations with him. And then they meet. She wasn’t attracted to the guy. She tells him off. And he’s stalking her now. As for me, I’m still not over TLB, am being haunted by the ex’s in my life, stalked by a boy I met while on vacation, and had a major falling out with my best guy friend (we’re ok now, btw. Yey!). [Risa, our other best friend, is regularly dating a fellow doctor and though they aren’t seriously discussing about marriage yet, she is quite content just taking one day at a time, focusing on finishing her OB-GYN residency.] As for Petite, she’s now happily engaged, so I guess, at least one of us has it figured out a bit. :)

Episode 1 of the 4th season of “Sex..” was shown during the party. Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha discussed whether they believed in soul mates. Carrie, who was celebrating her 35th birthday was analyzing why she still has not found her soul mate (noun : a person temperamentally suited to another). In the end, they decided they were each other’s soul mates. In the same token, I believe I have found my soul mates, too. At this point, even if I’m only dating a bunch of “unspecial people”, I have three special people (apart from my family, of course), who are always there when I need them. They are the kind of friends who call when you text that you’re sad and they don’t even ask why. They remained constant amidst the changes in our lives. No, we don’t go out for coffee and talk regularly. But that’s the beauty of it. We don’t need to do that to remain great friends. I guess there is that kind of love that transcends time and distance. I sure am one lucky girl. I have three soul mates!





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