I like R. So much. But not in an I-like-you-I-think-I-want-to-spend-the-rest-of-my-life-with-you way. I like R in the way that he reminds me of how it was to be young and in love and carefree. Of how youth gives us the license to be reckless, and never have to pay the price. Ok, so maybe, just a few tears. But that’s it. None of the scars that come from wounds that never really heals.
R is my eternal puppy love. Or at least symbolizes that. He is that part of my life where everything was made of pink and happy and cotton candy.
I can’t talk to him about grown-up stuff. No. I DON’T want to talk to him about grown up stuff. Because it might change the dynamics that we have. And I don’t want to risk it. I just want to milk this for all its worth. Until the real thing comes along.
The problem is, is there ever going to be a real thing?
I wish that something, someone, can give me an answer. Some kind of guarantee that I’ll have that too. But life does not work that way. Instead you just wait and hope and pray.
Have you ever tried taking a pause when you’re having a bad day? And you force yourself to think happy thoughts, until you find yourself smiling a small smile and ready to take on more, once again? R is the reason for that small smile during the pause. He’s the happy thought.
And happy thoughts never have bad endings. Unlike grown-up relationships.
Happy thoughts take us from one bad moment to the next. Until you no longer need a happy thought. Because what you need, no, WHO you need, is already there next to you.
Dose Me
- Petite
- Mark
- Jude
- Rene
- Sieggy
- Nic
- Elmer
- Jonna
- Must Love Dogs
- Jeepney Diaries
- Yuan
- Fragmented
- Beach House
- October 2001
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Virtual Hug
Spoonful of Music
Eye Candy
always on vacation mode ;)
Vitamin F
Memory Boosters
