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ALONE IN THE STORM

Sunday, June 22, 2008


While outside, the winds are heavy and blowing against my window panes, the storm within me is raging as well. I've spent weeks trying to figure out if everything is still worth fighting for, and in that time I felt love and not-love struggling to outdo each other. 

We've made peace again today for the nth time. I'm not sure if it's the masochist in me, plunging on ahead, knowing there's inevitable pain, or the optimist in me, moving forward knowing life is not all the worst because of the presence of pain, but with the absence of love.

So were once again back in square one. Not really a bad place to be. I'd rather start all over again than continue the path that we've been going.

I just really hope we can do it right this time around. 

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WANTING SOMETHING NEW

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Why is it that the moment something goes wrong in our lives, the first thing that comes to our minds is to take flight?


What is so alluring about running away? Something happened today has made me revisit my plans to consider moving to Oz. 

The clock is ticking and it's getting louder. And much harder to ignore. 

It's time for another serious reflection. Which makes me want to run away some more. Maybe then I can feel like I'm myself again. I feel so lost lately. And sometimes so alone. I keep saying something, trying to express something, but no one seems to understand. It's been so long since I've felt this pain. And before you ask, No, I'm not ok.

Maybe tomorrow I will be. Actually, make that a definite, yes, I'll be ok. There's no other option. 

But til then, I'll wallow in this pain. 

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SHAMELESS PLUG

Monday, June 02, 2008

So now they're down to five. Truth be told, I didn't expect Beauty to come this far. But she has, and I'm very proud of her. Despite of criticisms (and gaining so much weight), she remained true to herself, and then improved some. That surely is a feat for a barely legal teener.


I can attest to this, Beauty is a rebellious girl, but she is family-oriented. Not only is she a loving daughter and sister, but she's very close to her cousins as well. And she has ambition. Or diskarte, as she calls it. I really, really hope that her dreams will come true.

So in that note, I would like to make a shameless plug. And make an appeal. I don't usually do this. But this is a special case for a special girl.

Please support my niece, Beauty for PBB Teen Big 4. 

Text BB Beauty to 2331 (for Globe, Sun, TM subscribers) or 231 (for Smart, Talk N Text, Addict subscribers).

Voting now open til June 07, 2008. Maximum 30 votes/day. 

Thanks so much. 

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